How to Enjoy Being Single?


Being single is not a life sentence. It is not something to be dreaded. However most of us feel that it is the worst thing that can ever happen in our lives. We fear being alone. We equate being single to loneliness.

But single life can also be fun and exciting. There are so many things that a person can do enjoy doing when he or she is single. Single life can be happy, if you choose to be happy.

Have the Right Mindset

While you watch your bffs who have beaus and feel sorry for yourself, other singles out there are having a time of their lives. They are having adventures and living life to the fullest. The good news is you can do it.

But before you can start enjoying single life, you must first have the proper mindset. You need to know how to be happy just by being alone. Yes I mean it, being alone. Not being with friends or family but enjoying time with yourself. Why? Because truly appreciating your own company is the key to a happy single life.

1. Go on a date with yourself – Well you need to learn how to enjoy your own company. You need to feel less and less longing to have other people surround you all the time. Most of the singles who are lonely about their lives are the ones who do not know how it is to be alone.

So go out, watch a movie by yourself. Buy yourself that giant pizza you want and eat it. Take pics of yourself eating and enjoying. Then go shopping or play games at the arcade.

2. Cherish your inner child – Remember when you were a kid and you’d play alone? You had so much fun just playing make belief. Yes you had fun with your playmates but your alone play time was the best. Now you need to find that. Find the spark you once lost. And reclaim it!

Your inner child yearns for you. Through years and years of work, pressures and stress, you forgot about him or her. You have put your inner child aside. Now if you go pick him or her up again, you will learn to enjoy life with or without someone beside you.

3. Don’t compare your life – Many people feel dissatisfied with what they have because they always think that there is something greater out there. They pine while they browse facebook looking at the pictures of their friends going on romantic dates and getting married. But what they don’t know is that their married friends also envy them!

Never compare your life journey with others. Some people get married, some have kids, some are single, some are gay and some are straight. Everybody has something different on their plates.

If you keep on comparing your life, you will never ever be happy!

4. Live! – OK so now you know the basic mindset that you should have. First is being happy alone, then embracing your inner child and lastly is contentment. Now you need to do step four, the most difficult step: LIVE.

Life is not just meant to be dreamt about, it is meant to be lived.

Stuff Singles Can Do

Being single can fun and fabulous. You can do so many things and enjoy your life. You can go places that you can’t just go to if you are in a relationship or if you have a family. You can manage your own time and work on yourself while you are single.

1. Travel solo – A long long time ago, people did not see traveling solo as a fun thing. Well that was till travel bloggers started posting fun stuff that they have been doing while they are alone on a trip.

2. Work on your Skills – Learn how to cook or learn how to speak French. You can take up a new course to enhance your skills at work. You have the time. Do something to improve yourself.

3. Spend time with your friends – Have you ever thought about your friends whom you haven’t seen for some time? Well now is the time to catch up with them. A lot of times people who are in a relationship don’t spend time anymore with their pals because they just want to hangout with their beau.

4. Get a pet – Okay, I get that you want someone to cuddle with or someone to hangout with at home. Well you can. Adopt a dog or a cat from a shelter. They will love you unconditionally.

5. Pamper yourself – You don’t need anyone’s permission to go to the salon or the spa. You can go there by yourself and treat yourself to some pampering. I promise it would make you feel fab and happy (and less stressed).

Honestly, there is a hundred million things you can do by yourself. You can travel, eat, go bungee jumping, learn how to cook or do whatever you want. The key here is having the courage to live life and being happy with or without someone.

Remember that a partner should never complete you, they should just complement you. You should learn how to be complete by yourself. And if you put your happiness on someone else, you’ll never ever be truly be happy.

Is Money a Factor in Relationships?

Money and relationshipsMoney makes the world go around according to many people. But is money a factor in dating and relationships? Does it determine a happily ever after or maybe it doesn’t? Truthfully to some extent it does, but it should not be a big deal.

Relationships need love, time, effort and some money. When you first start dating it may not be a big deal but as you share things more and more, money becomes something you both share. There are times that one person spends more and the other one less and vice versa. However money can greatly affect the relationship in the long run because money is commensurate to a certain amount of effort we put in in our work.

How Does Money Affect Relationships?

When you first meet each other, you just think about how giddy you are that you’ve found someone like this person who is totally amazing. You don’t care much about his or her bank account (well unless that is all you are after or you’re a gold digger). You just think about how you want to be with this person and don’t really mind how much he or she makes.

On the other hand, as the relationship progresses, you both share experiences together. Experiences may or may not entail money. Most of the time, a lot of things do cost money. Having dates, trips, eating out, watching movies and other activities do cost money. As you go further into the relationship, there will be a point where you will need to share expenses for your day to day needs. Both of these entail a wise balance and a healthy conversation about finances.

1. Dating and money

In the beginning of dating and a relationship, money is not such a big factor. Money only becomes a factor when one or both parties feel that dates have to be expensive and luxurious. But dates can be spent well with as little as a blanket and some stars in the park at night. You can catch Netflix together or just tell stories as you have coffee. It does not need to be expensive.

But on the other hand even before going into the serious stuff you have to know if the other person is someone you can trust with money. Because as you take the relationship further, you will discover that sharing your finances will be more common. If you date someone who is careless about money or is too controlling about money, you may end up bitter in the end.

2. Going Deeper

As you go deeper into the relationship you will discover that sharing your finances with the other party is becoming more and more common. Splitting the bill is going to be a part of the equation. Sometimes you will need to travel with one another which will entail both of you chipping in.

When your relationship progresses, your plans together mesh as well. These means looking at the future such as thinking about moving together, getting married or having children (or not having children). All of these would entail you to make decisions together on how to spend your money. This would mean that you need to be in sync in making monetary decisions. If you are with someone who has a totally different set of values about money, you may need to have a discussion about it and be clear right at the very beginning.

3. Moving together and/or Getting Married

Once you decide to move in together, at first you will both say that the bills will be split in half or someone might be paying more. You have to be clear what direction the finances go so there will no fights involving money. Everything about moving together involves money. Will you share the expenses on food? Or will each one pick out his or her own meal? How will you pay for the utilities. I know these things don’t go into the minds of most people who move in together, but they are part and parcel fo the equation.

On the other hand, once you get married, you are now bound by love and law to share money in half literally. You will buy stuff together: houses, cars, educational plans and lots of other stuff. In this phase of your relationship, you will need to be clear with one another about how you both want to grow your money together. Is having a debt OK or not? What are credit cards for? There are so many questions you need to answer about money and finances when you get married.

Do’s and Don’t’s About Money in Your Relationships

As you see money does matter in a relationship. In the ideal world it should not be that important but in truth, money will always be a factor in any form of relationship. On the other hand, there are do’s and don’t’s about how money should be in you relationship.

Do – Do talk about it as the relationship goes deeper.
Don’t – Don’t sound like an accountant in the beginning of the relationship.
Do – Do plan on how you spend money
Don’t – Don’t date someone who has no financial plans if you want a stable life
Do – Do balance your finances together.
Don’t – Don’t spend too much money to impress the other person
Do – Do have savings, separate or together.
Don’t – Don’t fight about money.

Those are just a few. There are so many things couples need to know about money and balancing it as they work their way with living together and growing old together. It does not matter whether you are in the beginning of the relationship or in the end part, you must be careful about money.

Yes, money does matter in relationships. You must take into account that you work to make money and money helps you live the life you want. On the other hand it is not everything in life. Love is still more important. You must work together to achieve your dreams.

What Do Guys in Their 20s Want with Women in Their 40s?


Women are amazing creatures. They can be fragile but strong. They can be brave yet vulnerable. They can be funny and witty but they can also be cut throat high hilled tigers. Women are said to rule the world. Men cannot get enough of them. The feminine power is undeniably strong. But what do women on their forties have that men in their 20s absolutely dig them.

Women in their forties are unlike women in their twenties and a little bit like the women in their thirties. Most women in their forties are already stable and have a strong career. They have mastered the art of getting dressed up and the art of stripping their clothes off. They are absolutely mystifying. Women in their forties are not old, they are just in their prime (have you seen Jennifer Aniston lately?). A long, long time ago, women in their forties have resigned themselves to staying home and waiting for the grand kids to pop out, but not anymore. The new millennium has turned things around. Before older men pry on young women and set aside women who are more mature, but now they are like the prime cuts of steak; everybody just wants a piece of them.

I’m not discounting younger women. As I am still in my early thirties. I’ve been an insecure teenager too. I have navigated the days when I was only starting my career in my twenties. And now that I have started to really have a savings account and have a plan on buying a house, I had come to understand why men who are young and hot find women in their middle age so alluring.

Here are the reasons why women in their 40s are just so irresistible.

  1. Women in their forties are confident – Women in their forties have already gone through so much in life. They have experienced enough crap for them to be confident in their own skin. They have good careers, a decent amount of savings and they know which outfit flatter their figures. They know how to feel sexy. They are not insecure but rather classy. They are not desperate and cloying for attention. Women in their forties are like lionesses in the African safari, they know what that they can deliver a kill.
  2. They take no bullshit – We women think we are empowered but to some extent we bargain for the sole purpose of getting peace and balance. Sometimes we don’t know when to walk away from something because we feel it is very important to us. On the other hand women in their forties have no time or patience to standby people and things that do not give them the right results. Men find this really interesting and challenging. It is very sexy to see a woman who can totally be in control of her life.
  3. They have no time for games – Some younger women resort to tricks and games to get what they want, don’t get me wrong women in their forties can also be manipulative if they want to. But unlike younger women. They know the right kind of strategies. They know how to navigate their way through mostly everything. It’s not a game at all for them but a well thought out plan that is executed properly. Men in their twenties normally want to play around, but they get to be upright with older women. They long for that discipline. In a way, it’s liberating for these boys, because they just have to real, good and honest. They know women who are forty-ish are going to dispose them if they are just going to play games so they try to be good.
  4. They are self-sufficient – Chivalry is not yet dead, but sometimes men also want to take a rest from picking up the bill from dinner. Women in their forties are normally employed gainfully and don’t need a man to give them what they want. It is nice to know that a woman does not really care about how much you make, but rather is interested in how good you are in conversation, life or sex.
  5. They are mysteriously sexy – There is just absolutely something mystifyingly sexy about women in their later years. Take Sarah Jessica Parker for example. She is 50 now but she can still turn heads of men when she walks down the street. Women in their forties know that investing in a good pair of lingerie goes a long way and that foreplay is not just for women but also for men. They put on musky perfume that do not overpower the senses but rather wake it up in a sensual way. They know how to work a white shirt and jean matched with a killer set of heels. They know the little black dress is so much better than the most fashionable dress that just came out from the stores. The red lipstick and some mascara makes them look hot way better than a ton of make-up.
  6. They have money and are not desperate – Women in their forties do not beg. They work hard and they know how to value things. They have already gone through the phase of balancing their check books and drinking too much martinis in the past. They have enough experience. They may not have a ton of money, but they have enough to live decently. They are not desperate to be loved, they love themselves already. Men just love women who are able to run their lives well.
  7. They are wise – Boy will be boys. Sometimes they long for some motherly pampering. Motherly in the sense of not being treated like a child but motherly in the sense that more mature women can give them decent advise on their work, life and almost everything. They can have tactics into making money work, having great sex and living a fulfilled way. This is a really great way for a man to find someone to lean on and support him. Take Ashton Kutcher for example with Demi Moore. Yes they may have broken up but he says that she gave him valuable advice in his life.

So why do men love older women?


Men love older sexy women because they are just like wine. They grow better with age. They become delicate, crisp and so addicting. We younger women can take this into example. We don’t really need to forty to be wise and mature, we just need to be disciplined enough to emulate their class and demeanor.

As for myself, I’m really trying. I want to be able to just shop for the stuff that really need and save more. I want to be able to go to a restaurant and know what I want. I want to be able to enjoy my food without being guilty. And lastly I want to perfectly happy in my own skin… but I’ll always, always love eating marshmallows.


Amaze a Guy with Your Beauty on Your Date

Beauty Tips on a Date

Let’s face it, men are visual creatures. They associate women’s looks with attractiveness. Men tend to feel that a woman who is well proportioned, healthy and clean would be a suitable mate. He feels that a female which at some level have similarities to him will be a good mate. She does not necessarily need to be a perfect hour glass but being proportioned means even if she is plus sized or skinny that her waist is smaller than her chest and hips. Men a hard wired to associate a woman’s looks with the viability for mating and producing a healthy offspring. But besides the science, men really love the feminine beauty and find joy in seeing it.

Amazing a man would mean that he finds you irresistible and sexy. He will think that you look cute and fun to be with. Looking pretty also boosts his interest in you for a long time. I know you may think that hey this is all shallow but clearly it is not. Women of any size and shape has some form of beauty; all they need to do is to find it and enhance it.

Here are some ways to work on what you already have and impress the man you are eyeing on your date.

  1. 1. Be clean and fresh – Men are generally wash and wear. They can be slobs sometimes. Being fresh and clean is normally a big factor for a man to find you attractive. Being constantly fresh is an exact opposite of masculinity so this can really work wonders for you. Take a shower every day. On you date, use a nice scented soap or shower gel. Don’t use something overpowering since this can be a turnoff. Your hair should be clean and not oily. Groom your body hair by trimming or shaving them or better yet waxing them. Men find hairless women attractive since this is very feminine. Your nails should be clean. Don’t grow them too long, as this may turn some men off. If you wear nail polish make sure they are not all chipped up.
  2. Look nice but sexy – When on a date your clothes can really make a difference. Don’t wear sweat pants or anything that makes you look like you just got out of bed. Don’t overdo your clothes too; I mean don’t dress like a drag queen or a desperate cheerleader. Men find women who leave something to their imagination sexy. Showing some skin is always good. Choose a particular part to show off. Normally men love seeing a bit of cleavage but don’t show most of it since you are not a hooker. You can also show a part of your back or legs. The rule of thumb is if you want to show off the top part of your body, then wear something decent for your bottoms like a pair of jeans or a skirt that is not too short. If you wish to show off your legs you can wear a nice tee or blouse. You can pair shorts with a long sleeved blouse. Just think about sexy librarian. She is ultimately hot but not desperate.
  3. Wear your hair – Studies have shown that your hair has a very strong power in attracting men. Men normally like hair that fall in waves. It should never look too stiff or dry. If you have long hair, you may opt for letting it loose. If you have shorter hair, keep it sexy by wearing chandelier earrings. Your hair should be soft and clean. Having great smelling hair is a must. You can spray some perfume on your hands, clap them and let the wetness evaporate a bit and run it through your tresses. You don’t really need to wash your hair everyday if your hair tends to be dry but make sure that it does not feel greasy. Condition your hair for added softness. Having damaged hair normally is a signal of being unhealthy and sends subliminal messages to a guy that you are not suitable for mating. Ponytails are an effortless way too to look sexy. Men dig seeing your naked nape.
  4. Have kissable lips – Scientific fact, men normally subconsciously associate our upper lips to your nether lips. Your lips should never look fake and sticky. Men get scared of overly shiny lips and glittered lips. Stay away from lip shiners that make you look like you have just eaten a tub or lard. Yeah they look nice on the models on those glossy magazines but they look scary to kiss in real life. Make sure to invest in a smear proof lipstick. Apply your lip balm at list 30minute before your date because they may feel too wet to kiss. Don’t lick your lips to try to moisten them. Your saliva contains enzymes that cause them to crack.
  5. Don’t wear too much make up – If a man asked you on a date, then he already finds you somewhat attractive. You should stay away from drag queen make up. Men feel that women who put on too much make up are superficial and shallow. Put light make up. Enhance your lashes with some mascara. Don’t put too much eyeliner, you are not a raccoon. Eye shadow should just highlight the eyes. Your blush on should look real and not like you drank too much wine. Remember that you should not look too different from when you have just had woken up since that is the face he will see right after you have sex.
  6. Have a pretty, dazzling smile – Everyone loves a smiling face. It instantly brightens your face. It’s like seeing a beautiful sunshine in a summer’s day. A pretty smile does not have anything to do with how your teeth are, they can be all crooked but still look cute. Keep your teeth clean and at least be in the same shade. You can try those blue tinted toothpastes that give you an instant bright smile.
  7. Be smart and have good conversation skills – Being attractive is not just looks alone. You can be one hot body but if your head is empty then the man would find you boring. You should offer something for him to be interested in you more than just getting into your panties. Having interests like books, art, music and hobbies would impress him. Stop blabbering how terrible your job or your friends are. Men find a woman who complains a lot irritating. On the other hand, don’t just be a nodder and agree with everything he says. You need to be able to have your own beliefs and opinions too.

Dating Beauty TipsSo How Do I Impress Him

A few simple words, look clean, pretty and real. Fake women are soon revealed one way or another. It’s not all about being beautiful, it’s also having something between your ears. Simple things like being clean can go a long way. A nice sundress can look cute and sexy. Air dry your hair and brush it. Good luck!


Why Do Men Act Like They’re Interested on a Date?

men-161005_640Why do men behave the way that they do? Sometimes we get puzzled and we just want to analyze them. There are so many things we would like to know about them. Men are not like women and women are never like men. Sometimes their identities collide and some traits merge, but most of the time the sexes have their own traits. Men are always seen as simple species and that they are easy to get but sometimes that is just not the case.

One of the things you’d probably want to know is if why men show mixed signal like why do they seem want to go out with you even if they can’t. I have tried interviewing a few of my guy friends to find out what is the real deal about this issues. I mean I have been burned too before. I have had my fair share of thinking a guy likes me but in the end he was really not. I’ll be a bit satirical here, I just want to vent out how my ego was bruised and broken too. But most of all, I’d want to help those girls out there who have been waiting for that Prince Charming, who will forever stay mum.

The Thrill of the Chase

Men are creatures of the hunt. Men’s DNA has been programmed to pursue things that they see as interesting, rare and covetable. If a woman seems to be viable and a good prospect, he will really try to chase her. On the other hand, if she is just like a meat dangling in his face then probably he will be lazy in asking you out since he thinks you’re just always available there. Aside from that it make you seem boring. He gets bored, so he does not pursue you anymore.

Another thing is that he might chase and chase you, then if he never seems to catch you, then he will stop chasing you too. He would eventually get exhausted. If he sees a quarry uncatchable then he will stop running after you. So stop playing hard to get, this is not the eighteenth century anymore for you to be wooed and courted.

I have known this guy who would really make an effort for the girl. He would buy flowers and all that, but I was too busy at that time. We went out on a few dates but there were other guys at that time so I could not focus on him. I thought he was really devoted but in the end he just got tired of waiting for me. Well he’s married now and I’m over that.

Some Men Just Want to Flirt

Flirting is fun. Let’s admit it. The attention we get from the first meeting is just addictive. The giddy feeling from flirting is such a good feeling that some men feel that they can’t get enough of it. They will flirt with anyone and EVERYONE. We would say it’s kind of unfair but this is a reality. It is a harmless way to get those feel good hormones in your system. Men do it, women do it. It’s just that some do it more because they get so into the flirting game.

If the boy you are eyeing is known to be a flirt, then give up. He might really be into you and he might really want to date you but if he just flirts and flirts then he just might not be into really going out with you. You may risk it, and ask him out. But just be prepared to be turned down because he just might say no or laugh at your face.


He Found Out Something About You That He Did Not Like

Let’s face it, some people put their best foot forward when they present themselves in the world. Being real all the time is the deal here. Men hate fakes and liars. If you hate his friends and pretend to like them or if you pretend to like PlayStation or something then he finds out then he would just not go out with you anymore. No one likes to be fooled.

He might also find out that you have very little in common and don’t want to waste time going out with you when he already know that you guys won’t click. Being able to share something is something important to guys and they feel that a girl is really interesting beyond her looks when she has a great personality that would mesh well with his.

On Conclusion

Men may be complicated for us women. But they are just pretty simple. They normally mean what they say and show it. But sometimes don’t read too much into the situation. But if you feel that you really like a guy, why not take the lead. We are no longer hampered by social standards that men are the only ones to ask out a girl. Come to think of it, in Japan, it is the women who give men chocolates on Valentine’s Day! Cut your losses short and just ask him out, if he says no then move on. I mean it would hurt like hell or would be embarrassing but it is better than waiting and waiting for something that you’d never know when it would come.


When Should a Woman Have Sex with a Man?

When should a woman have sex with a man?

Sex, sex, sex. The magical word that tickles our mind like feather teasing the middle of your foot. Some people love it, some people hate it (stuck up pricks), and some people die for it and most people can’t get enough of it. It is one of the most meaningful three letter words ever in the English dictionary. It has simply more power than a tank barreling down in war trail.

But when should women start having the big “S”? Well, it totally depends on you and your standards. I mean it is no longer the time of the Edwardian period where you have to get married to get down and dirty. Today’s women should be more empowered to know what is right for them and their bodies. Social norms should not apply to you or anyone else for that matter. We make the social norms. If you are doing it safe, then why not?

OK, OK. I’ll give you the low down on when it would really be great to have sex with a man.

Date #3

When should a

There is simply no right time, but date number three would be fine – The first date sex is totally cool with me. I mean it just means you both got the hots for one another. But hey, you don’t want that spark to fizzle out right? Men love the thrill of the chase. If they see you as an easy target, they will get bored with you and eventually will just find someone else that thrills them.

Just in case you guys end up boinking each, always be prepared. Don’t expect the man to carry the rubber all the time. You don’t want additional responsibilities right away. There is nothing more uncool than getting STD or getting pregnant when you’re not yet ready.

By date number three, you guys have probably exchanged a reasonable amount of texts to have sex. You have shared a bit of you with him and vice versa. Waiting a little bit helps because it builds the tension for him, making you more irresistible. Try to play the sexy game. Make him drool over you. There is no need to wear a see-through dress for that matter. Be subtly sexy. Spray some light and memorable perfume. Don’t put too much make up on. Don’t act too desperate.

Chemistry is chemistry. If you feel that there is an electric charge between the two of you, then probably you can go for it.

You are not a prostitute, Don’t Act like One

Don’t trade sex for attention or feelings. I mean yeah, sex is powerful and it has driven kings on their knees and all but you should not treat yourself like a piece of meat for trade. If you think you can lure a guy into a full-fledged relationship by using your wares to make him commit, well think again. Men can separate their heart and their hard on. They can be totally into you in bed, but they may not be in love with you. There must be something more than sex for him to want to be your BF.

If ever you get him to stay because of sex, things would possibly fizzle out in the end so you’ll see him bored in the end. You guys have to have more than sex to make a relationship last.

Norms, Schnorms

Well in the end it would always be you to decide when it would be best to jump into bed with Mr. Hottie. If you’ve got the chemistry, then go for it. Having sex should never seem to be like brain surgery. It should be fun and pleasurable. Just don’t look too clingy. Use your feminine charms to take the reins in the relationship.

Men are intrigued with mystery and sex. Keep him on his toes by sending this mysterious vibe. If he is in the office. Flirt with him sometimes but don’t just put it out there. Make him guess. Allow him to know you’re interested but not dying to be with him. Don’t be a booty call girl, be the vixen he can’t get enough of.

Sex is just so powerful. Everyone wants to have it, whether they admit it or not. The key here ladies is to be the sweet and innocent girl he wants but also be the mind-blowing sex goddess that oozes that appeal.

Enjoy sex…





Let Your Heart Heal

love-482709_1280Breaking up is hard to do, but this is when the real work begins. You might tell yourself that you will be more cautious with your heart and take your time falling in love the next time, but too many people rush into a new relationship after just exiting one. Once you are alone, it can become a scary experience and jumping into a new love affair seems like the best way to deal with your own issues. However, if you want to be ready for a healthy and happy new relationship, you must take time for yourself and wait before jumping into a new relationship.

You’re Still Hung Up

The problem with jumping into a new relationship is that you are not over your previous partner. Many people are still hung up on the past when they delve into a new love affair. You must be truly over your ex and at peace with that part of your life before you can even contemplate having meaningful feelings for someone new. This takes time and you have to give yourself the ability to find closure. Not taking time might result in you choosing someone that simply reminds you of your ex or your past relationship. You have to be fair to yourself and your next partner by taking the time that you need to truly move on.

Can you get your ex back?

Sometimes you really need to just get over someone, however hard that may be, what if you want your ex back.  Give it some time to find out whether or not you really want them back or if its just that your ego has been hurt, or you are lonely.  If you really want them back and you had a good thing going, you can try, but it probably won’t be easy. You really need to understand why it went wrong and how you can change things otherwise your ex girlfriend or boyfriend isn’t even going to listen to you.  There is some good advice and some bad advice available for those who want to go down this path, I’ve seen it all.  The best thing I know about if you really want to fix your relationship is the text your ex back system by Michael Fiore which you can find out more about  at fellow dating expert The Love Queen’s site – Text your ex back review.  Let me know if you use it and what you think.

Why Rush?

Rushing into a new relationship is something that almost everyone does, but why is it so common? The real answer is that most people do not want to be alone. Being alone can be depressing and make you feel unworthy of love. You don’t realize how important being confident in your single status is to finding your real soul mate. You must be happy with who you are and your own accomplishments before you can really complete someone else. Being scared to be alone is common, but it should not lead you into a new relationship before you are truly ready. Being alone will make you learn more about yourself and find out what your true strengths are. Being single for a little while is not a bad thing and is actually the best thing you can do for your next relationship.


Convenience Is No Way To Love

Many people dive right into a new love affair, because it is convenient and easy. You should know by now that many things that are easy or convenient are not necessarily best for you. You might have just met a nice guy at work or a handsome guy at the bar, but do not rush it. You can still get to know people when you are healing from a breakup, but this means building a friendship. Relationships that are built ton more than just attraction and chemistry are actually the most successful. This means that you should proceed with caution and not make any quick decisions when it comes to love. Take your time and do not date based on convenience.

Be In Control of Yourself

Many people jump into new relationships because they are taking bad advice. Your friends and family may think that you need to dive right into the dating pool, but they are not you. Your mom might be pressuring you to move on and make grandbabies, but don’t let this get you down. You have to do what is right for you and that means not being influenced by others. You will know when the time is right to get back into the dating world again. Just take control of your heart and make sure that you just take your time.

Some inspiring quotes about self control and love

Friends with… Benefits? Is It For You?

There are times that you just can’t get sex out of your head. There are times that you may feel lonely and alone. There are times that you feel that you have needs that you want to be fulfilled. Sometimes you just crave intimacy and sensuality. There are also times that you’re so damn busy that you don’t have time to go out on dates. There are times that you just want to celebrate your body. There are times that you feel that you just want no nonsense sex. There are times that you may have thought about having a FUBU – a friend with benefits. On the other hand, you’re wondering is this your cup of tea?

Benefits of having a Friends with Benefits.

Sensuality and sexuality is but a normal human need and being able to satisfy it is important to achieve a balanced wellbeing. Many may say that having sex should be exclusive to people in relationships only. However this is not true, it is your body and it is your choice how to be happy and fulfill your needs. One of the ways to reconcile the craving would be to find a friend who can agree with you to explore the world of sex.

Going into this kind of set-up has its ups and downs. There are many things that normal relationships do not offer that you can find here. One of the best things about this being able to enjoy sex… pure fun sex.


No Strings Attached

Going into FUBU (f**k buddy) mode allows you to do fun crazy things in your sexual escapade. It’s not that couples could not do it, but some may be limited due to some things. Being in a non-committed sexual relationship allows you to have several sexual partners (don’t forget to use protection and contraception) at any given time. You are able to have group sex, role playing and just have no holds barred fun. If both of you and your partner consent, you can do many different experiences to the table. You are not tied to one partner only. You are free.

On the other hand, you can say no to sex. If your “friend” calls you for a booty call, you can say no because you’d rather sleep, you don’t need to fear about hurting his or her feelings because you’re not in a relationship anyway. Both of you can agree when to or when not to have sex. No strings attached.

Fun, Fun and More Fun

Sometimes people are just looking for the element of fun. The noncommittal factor of not being in a relationship adds to this. There is the feeling of pure sexuality, which is pure bliss. You can do it in your lunch break with an office buddy then go back to your desk with a smile. You can go to a new city, meet someone new, hang out and have some fun sex without needing to commit.

Commitments are great. They offer stability and being always having someone there, but sometimes you could just not find someone to commit to or you just don’t have the time so if you want to still have fun, sensual nights, why not have a friend with benefit?

When Is Having Friends with Benefits not Beneficial?

Having a buddy to jump into bed with can be fun but sometimes it’s just not for everybody. Some people may get hurt in this process instead of reaping the benefits. Before engaging in this kind of situation you must first take a look at the pros and also the cons.


Being too Emotionally Attached.

If you’ve just broken up with someone and you’re looking for a quick fix to cure your broken heart going the FUBU route may not be for you. You may confuse the fun sex hormones with falling in love again and may see the person as the replacement for your lost love. If you are desperate to get into a relationship, then this is a bad idea. If you engage into a non-committal sexual set up and you’re hoping it would turn into something else then think again. The other person may end up seeing you as too clingy and end up running away. He or she may have clearly defined that there is no relationship that is going to happen, yet you secretly hope that he or she would change his or her thoughts. Wake up that is not gonna happen. You will just look like an obsessed stalker or a loony case.

Going into this kind of arrangement requires a level of maturity and acceptance. If you are planning to use it to get into something more serious then you need to be prepared. The other person may or may not want it to be that way, so you have to be able to accept that.

I found some great advice about this and other friends with benefits issues at the Love Queen –

You are already in a committed relationship and just plan to cheat.

Well, let’s face it people cheat for a reason. But going into consensual sex with someone outside your relationship without the knowledge of your partner is a big no-no. You’re not just cheating on your partner, your also cheating your friend. This person probably does not want drama in their lives. They want to enjoy sex and not carry someone’s emotional baggage. If you feel that you want to go fooling around with different people, then it is better to break up from the relationship first before going into a friends with benefits route.

However, if your partner is on the exploratory side and is OK to be polyamorous, then it’s fine. Both of you can enjoy having friends satisfy your needs, either together or separately at a time.

With the modern times here comes modern relationships. We now know that sex is not just for exclusively committed people. Friends can share experiences that satisfy biological needs. Friends with benefits can help you experience life in a more enjoyable, satisfying way.



Your First Time: Losing Your Virginity

Life is full of firsts, from your first day of school to your first kiss. Being the first is what makes things or moments in your life so memorable and meaningful. When it comes to losing your virginity, this is one first that you do not want to rush or regret. There is no such thing as the perfect first sexual experience, but you can make sure that you are ready and have chosen the right person. Sex is awkward and a little painful the first time, but you can make it special by choosing someone that you have genuine feelings for. There are many factors that go into losing your virginity from religion to your own values, but just make sure that you are always true to yourself.

Waiting Is Best

When you are young and in love, your judgment can be clouded. You might think that you are ready to lose your virginity, but being careful is always best. If you still have fear and do not feel like it is the right time for you, never compromise your feelings. You should always be in control of what you want and never let someone else talk you into losing your virginity before you are ready. Everyyoung girl photoone is different and waiting is the best thing to do if you are unsure. Sex will happen many times during your lifetime, but you only lose your virginity once. This means that you should make sure it is a memorable experience that you will look back on fondly.

The One

When you are choosing the person to lose your virginity to, it often comes down to your religious beliefs. Some people are waiting to lose their virginity until marriage, which means that you must find your one true love first. Other people are simply waiting to find someone that they truly love and have a connection with. When looking for the person to lose your virginity to, you must use both your head and your heart. As long as you have genuine feelings for this person, you can look back fondly on your first experience. Choose carefully and realize that having sex will only lead to stronger feelings. Make sure that the person you choose to lose your virginity to is worthy. If you are really in love, you may be ready.


When you are with someone that respects you and is willing to wait, this is a huge help. You should never choose to lose your virginity to someone that is trying to pressure or urge you. If someone fully respects you and is willing to wait, you will be more open to fully trust them. Losing your virginity often happens when you are younger, but knowing that your partner respects and truly cares for you will calm your nerves and help you make the best decision. Respect is the basis of any health relationship and you should only lose your virginity to someone that really respects you completely.

Let Go

You are only truly ready to lose your virginity when you understand that you are ready to fall deeper in love or have your heart broken. Nothing is guaranteed in love and you should always know this when you are looking to lose your virginity. You should take your time and understand what this will mean in your relationship. Any new step will change the complexion of your relationship in some way. It might be for the better, but there is always a chance it may not. Being mature and aware of what loves means to you will enable you to make the best decision when it comes to your virginity.


are you jealous?

How to overcome your jealousy

Overcoming Jealousy – You CAN do it!

There are few emotions that can be as toxic to a relationship in the way that jealousy can.  If you can get over this now you can make way for a healthy relationship and enjoy the dating process. Jealousy is a natural emotion and it can be managed in a healthy way. However, it can also poison any romance and result in your partner feeling smothered or controlled. You have to get to the root of the jealousy to determine if the relationship is healthy for both individuals. Sometimes jealousy is the result of a larger problem that can’t be fixed. If jealousy is becoming a huge part of your relationship, you must act now. You can’t keep feeling betrayed or accusing your partner. Eventually jealousy will rip the two of you apart. However, how do you begin to overcome jealousy? It will not be easy, but there are a few things that you can do to overcome your jealousy.

Ask Yourself Why

There is always an underlying reason for any emotion. You must ask yourself why you are constantly feeling jealous or threatened. Jealousy is a behavior that you choose and you must find out why. You have to determine if jealousy is just your natural way of coping and find out why you are deciding to act in this manner. At the end of eth day, you are the one choosing to get angry and jealous. The answer might give you insight on where to go from here.

Have You Been Hurt In The Past?

If you have been cheated on before, this may be the overriding cause of your jealousy. Your current partner doesn’t even have to be the one that cheated on you. You can have issues of jealousy connected to being cheated on in your past. Being cheated on leads people to feeling inadequate, fearful, untrusting and constantly jealous. You have to understand that jealousy can lead your partner to feeling attacked and unhappy. Eventually they will look for someone that trusts, respects and treats them with the dignity that your own jealousy will not allow. Being fearful of cheating can lead to feelings of jealousy that actually trigger cheating. It can be a dangerous web that you weave with constant feelings of jealousy.

Jealousy and Control

You should also understand that jealousy is also a way to try and dictate constant control. Many people that struggle with issues of jealousy also have control issues. If power is what you are always looking to achieve, you must start to understand how this will eventually make your partner feel. If you like the control and power that being jealous allows you to have, you need to work on your own issues to help release the strain it is placing on your relationship. You must decide to make a conscious decision to start respecting and stop controlling your partner. You must make different choices when it comes to your actions and the demands that you make.

jealousy photo

Respect and Happiness

A relationship will only flourish if both partners feel safe and respected. Jealousy simply makes any relationship turn toxic and eventually becomes its demise. If you are constantly jealous in your relationship, you must realize that this will not end well. Jealousy will eventually ruin everything that you and your partner have built together. You must decide if your jealousy is warranted or if you simply have other issues that are causing this emotion to come to life. Sometimes jealousy is a sign that you are not a good match for each other, but sometimes it simply means that you need to work through your own issues causing your jealous behavior. Ask yourself the hard questions and get to the underlying issues causing this emotion to surface.

Photo by williamshannon

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